Borkin – Cash For Bunnies

Here’s a silly piece I’m working on in stand-up.  (It’s not really stand-up comedy — it’s an exercise in writing for radio.)  Probably one of the most bizarre parodies I’ve written.  It’s short because it’s supposed to fit into a 30 second time-slot.

Borkin – Cash For Bunnies

Daughter:        Mom, what’s wrong?

Mom:       I just have all this silly gold lying around and I don’t know what to do with it!

Daughter:      Duh Mom!  Just take it to Borkin!

Mom:                  Who?

Daughter:      Jeez Mom, don’t you watch the TV?  Borkin!  He’ll give you the most bunnies for your old gold, jewelry, diamonds, and used sports equipment!

Mom:      What about my collection of novelty Clark Gable busts?

Daughter:      Borkin will sell those on consignment for even more bunnies!

Mom:      What’s consignment? Oh well, I love bunnies!

Daughter:      I told you Borkin’s the best!

VO:      Located in the back alley behind your nephew’s drug dealer’s parking garage.

OH… for those of you who live outside the GTA… it’s a parody of this terrible commercial:  Oren




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